Non-Practicing

My beautiful Wife asked me the other day why I always say non-practicing alcoholic instead of recovering alcoholic. To me the answer was easy, since I will never recover from being an alcoholic, there is nothing to recover from. I can either choose to abstain from drinking or practice the art of alcoholism. From the Alcoholics Anonymous website alcoholism FAQ: The mere fact of abstaining from alcohol for months or even years has never qualified an alcoholic to drink "normally" or socially. Once the individual has crossed the borderline from heavy drinking to irresponsible alcoholic drinking, there seems to be no retreat. Few alcoholics deliberately try to drink themselves into trouble, but trouble seems to be the inevitable consequence of an alcoholic's drinking. After quitting for a period, the alcoholic may feel it is safe to try a few beers or a few glasses of light wine. This can mislead the person into drinking only with meals. But it is not too long before the alcoholic is back in the old pattern of too-heavy drinking - in spite of all efforts to set limits for only moderate, social drinking. The answer, based on A.A. experience, is that if you are an alcoholic, you will never be able to control your drinking for any length of time. That leaves two paths open: to let your drinking become worse and worse with all the damaging results that follow, or to quit completely and to develop a new pattern of sober, constructive living. I know this to be true. I had a personal example that I rue to this day. I had stopped smoking for six months and was feeling pretty good about it. Then one day I passed by one lone cigarettee sitting on a table at work. The cigarettee was convenientlyy located by a nice clean ashtray and nestled up to a book of matches. It was perfect. Before I knew it I was firing it up and puffing away. I thought to myself, ah it's just one smoke it won't kill you. Well, the next day I had bought a pack of smokes and smoke to this day. So in fact, maybe that one smoke will kill me. (hopefullyy not, I hope to quit soon) That is better than what lies down the other road though. If I had picked up that conveniently placed beer on that hot day thinking, ah, it's just a beer it won't hurt, instead of that cigarette, I could be dead right now. I'd most certainly be without my Beautiful Wife and kids, living who knows where, doing who knows what practicing that vile art. If that one smoke helped teach me that I can never again down a cold one, then I don't begrudge it a thing. (well, maybe a little)