Church

I am on a mission, a mission that is turning out to be rather disappointing for me- I am trying to find a church to join. This is fast becoming a priority, as I want my children to be able to experience the joys of belonging to a church youth group. Growing up, the friends and connections I made in my youth group were paramount. I want that for my boys. Even though I grew up Lutheran and attended regularly both on Sundays and Wednesdays, I never really internalized their beliefs. That's not to say that I am not spiritual- I am, very much so. It's just that my God doesn't completely fit into organized Christian beliefs. Here are the differences I am struggling with: - I refuse to believe that God would not allow people into Heaven just because they had never heard of Jesus. To me, God is an all-loving, generous, accepting Being that will welcome people to Heaven if their heart is in the right place. I believe God presents himself in several different ways, to reach out to people in varying cultures. If you notice, Buddhism, Christianity, Taoism, Judaism and other religions all preach the same basic principle of respect and caring; to follow the Golden Rule, as it were. I believe in Jesus, I just don't believe,as Christians do, that He is the ONLY way. I think God is THE WAY. - Most Christians I've met believe that God reaches inside them and takes control. They believe that God is in control of their choices, their decisions, their circumstances. I disagree. To me, God loves us enough to allow us to make our own decisions. He provides opportunities for great things to happen in our lives, but leaves it to us to make the right choice. He trusts us to follow the proper path. And in doing so, He creates stronger characters in us. If God controlled all we do, why would we ever sin? It just doesn't make sense to me. I think that the better the choices I make, the more rewards I will see. And by choices, I don't mean just intentional decisions; my definition includes choosing to see the positive, learning from setbacks, and forgiving others. The boys and I have visited several churches now (and Hubby even comes once in a while) and we just haven't found the perfect fit yet. We have found two that are definite candidates, but one is loved by the boys, the other is the one I prefer. And so, I am coming to the point where I vacillate between finding a church with a dynamic youth group for my children or trying to locate a church that parallels my beliefs. Guess I will just keep attending different churches... I imagine my heart will tell me when I have found the right one.